How are you?
We’re asked that plenty, says Dr. Maria Baratta in a piece from Psychology Today.
And the answer, she writes, is usually the perfunctory “fine” or something equally trite. But asked, “What’s it like to be you?” that’s another story. When you ask someone that question, it’s the first step to a real connection.
Asking “What’s it like to be you?” is really different from being asked, “How are you?” For one thing, the message we give someone when asking them the question “What’s it like to be you?” is that you care, they matter, and that you really want to know the answer.
Granted, this can be challenging, and we usually have to remind ourselves to ask that question because, really, often we think our perception of another person’s behavior is all we need to know.
Oh nay nay.
In this episode, we’ll explore how learning to ask this question is such a game-changer in understanding others (especially when they’re not behaving like they “ought to”) and ourselves (when…well…same.)
Baratta, Maria, PhD., L.C.S.W. “What’s It Like to be You? How to Make a Real Connection.” Psychology Today, July 22, 2021.